I feel a huge change coming with 2019.
Epic. Maybe not so bad… No. Just the next step to get me one step closer to being who I was born to be.
I use to think I knew myself after I went through a huge loss. Then something new happened, and again I felt another kind of loss. A surprise almost. So… No big surprise even though it was a surprise. We lose things and at the same time gain two-fold. Or the opposite.
But I can feel the enormity coming with the new year like a storm or grey sky right before the rain and lightning hit.
We can only hope that tomorrow will be better than yesterday, and I can only hope 2019 will be my best year to date. Yet 2018 is going to be hard to surpass. Today someone asked me what was my greatest accomplishment from 2018. That’s easy.
Heiva San Diego was one of the most beautiful things I had ever seen. My creation survived and went beyond my expectations. I could feel a piece of the Mana in the air. Exactly why I created it in the first place. Yes, the Heiva SD was wonderful. How the hell am I going to surpass that next year? Easy. The Alliance Francaise de San Diego is also one of my fondest accomplishments. When you create a plan and see it executed, succeed, and continue how addicting the rewards are. The awkward French school has finally become my Charming Langue de Francaise school. 2018 represented hard work, commitment, and sacrifice on every level.
It was hard working till 2-3 in the morning. It was hard being thrown into a position to act like you know what you’re doing even though you’re totally unprepared (thank God the sharks couldn’t smell my fear). I’ve been committed to my dreams and aspirations. Nothing could have swayed that. Stronger than titanium, baby. and the sacrifice? Well, all that work, all that commitment; made me lose a piece of myself. And when you lose yourself, is that not the biggest sacrifice one can afford?
2018 was all about doing things for other people in order to bring me closer to the top. Proving myself. 2019 will be different.
I will always be available as long as someone needs my help. Kindness is not a must, it’s my core. But going into the new year I will no longer sacrifice myself for the means of others. My happiness is just as important as my dreams, my aspirations, and especially those of someone else. Do I deserve happiness? Yes, 2019. I do.
Peace be with you